Love is power

In my day-job, I work in the philanthropic sector. There is a fair amount of power differential built into that work: at the most basic level, deciding where money goes and how it gets to be used is one of the clearest ways in which power manifests in the capitalist world. (I say this without prejudice, though I have written before about how I feel about our economic system).

But there are other types of power built into the system too. Decisions about how we spend our time and what we spend it on. Biases in terms of what we deem effective and good. The language we use. The problems we see as priorities for solving. The definition of who “we” even are.

I used to think of power as something bad or at least potentially tainted. But the truth is that power just is. The value judgement is about what we use the power for. And while power often is connected with physical force, there is power in vulnerability too. Power in knowing when to lean in and when to let go. Power in having clear boundaries; knowing when to trust and when to doubt.

Or put in the shortest possible manner: there is power in love. Or maybe better: love is power.

Every morning, as a sit in silence, I hold that truth. I try to take it with me throughout my day. I try to hold it in our many meetings on moving money, to whom, and why. I try to center it as I let go of any control I might once have believed I had. I try to locate love in tension and disagreements. And when all else fails, I try to just feel love.

Some days are easier than others. Love is power, and I am work in progress.